If you ‘hear’ validations of your frustrations, anger, and condemnations, you will have more obstacles to contend with. This is a problem for many people, and one I take very seriously. I created the SEW technique to help people, and advise its use.
I used to be among the very few who advised against confrontation, condemnation, and venting. Not just for when you have troubles, but for your whole life.
Not because it is immoral, but because their hearts minds and souls are so full of love that the thought never enters into their mind. The other reasons, which follow, are trite in comparison. Is it because he is a “two timing so-and-so who should rot in hell”? Those few are cursed with true mental disorders, or are evil (a hard bar to reach).
It’s easy for us to assume that our partner shares our views without ever asking those all-important questions, which can lead to confusion and heartbreak.
The SEW technique is literally in the first section of our marriage course, that’s how important it is.
No matter what you know, or learn, proper execution requires self-control. You cannot pretend to love your husband just enough for him to love you back. Paul has written two books, produced several video programs, regularly speaks on marriage, and continues to guide the growth of The Marriage Foundation to help enrich the marriages of as many couples as possible around the world.
But, I was thrilled by the ultimatum given to the company by the hackers, because offering escapades to a married person having marriage trouble is like offering booze to an alcoholic. But I do not want you to think it will pass, and everything will automatically be okay.
If you do not change the underlying dynamics of your marriage, which you can accomplish without his involvement, this, and other problems, will keep cropping up again, and again.